Thank you, Chloe. You know, I was really extremely hesitant about this one, but that opening kept nagging at me and so I relented and jotted it down. Your feedback means a lot, as always.
This is such a gorgeous little slice of life. No need to apologise for the melancholic nature! Regret is something so painful and hard to write without cliche. I love the image you create - which says it all.
Thanks Kate, that's some lovely feedback. I know but also don't quite know where this one came from. (From meditations I have become acutely aware of thinking about the nature of reality more and more.) The opening line and image kept repeating within me, so at the weekend I gave in to it. To be honest, it was refreshing to constrain myself to so few words this week. It sure makes editing/proof-reading a quicker task! 😅
Thank you, Ben, that means so much. I hope you don't mind the use of your name. I considered changing it, but as I'm sure you know, sometimes names are indelible.
Thank you, Terry. Sometimes I wonder whether there's any worth in posting about the revision process and how a line can change and change and change, because that line of so few words sure underwent a lot of edits until it felt right. But then perhaps no-one wants to see or read about what could have been.
Funnily enough, that is exactly what I'm working on, partly, for my next behind the scenes post. With a bit of luck that will be out tomorrow, so YOU can tell ME😉
" fingers laced behind my head, feeling the breeze against my cheeks, listening to the crickets and the buzz of another bumblebee. The last sounds of summer." Love.
Thank you for sharing another beautiful, magical, transporting, and pensive piece. I'm intrigued by what prompted you to write it. And of course I would wish for it to be part of a lager work!
Thanks Nadia. I think I know where the seed has come from, but honestly, there was just this specific scene and that opening line floating around my head, over and over. So, it had to be written out to see what it was.
Oh absolutely. I'm glad you wrote it. Amazing how it kept floating in your head over and over again. It happens to me a lot too with poems and flashes.
Beautiful. Tender as the last minutes in a train station, when time stretches long and yet still compresses to nothing before the inevitable moment of parting.
Sep 15, 2023·edited Sep 15, 2023Liked by Nathan Slake
I enjoyed reading your story, Nathan. The richness of the details makes it beautifully immersive and once again you show that natural talent of knowing exactly how to write human interactions without making them forced. The things that are left unsaid, the body language, the way the world around feels given a certain context. Very inspiring stuff.
I wanted to leave a lot unsaid and up to the reader, but in my own interpretation and in writing this, yes, he did.
It was partly why I was hesitant to post this. Do you think it's ok? I see some people put warnings about themes at the top of their writing, but I thought to do so here would be to force an interpretation, and I think there are several interpretations here and that is perhaps just one of them.
Nathan, this is gorgeous. Beautifully written and so moving. Nice work not trying to dictate what wants to come through, this is so vivid. 🙏
Thank you, Chloe. You know, I was really extremely hesitant about this one, but that opening kept nagging at me and so I relented and jotted it down. Your feedback means a lot, as always.
Gosh, I’m so glad you went for it. It’s inspired me 🙏
Inspired you? My day will be forever buoyed by this knowledge 🤗
🤗💗
This is beautifully written, Nathan. Time, place and emotion all perfectly captured in this fleeting snapshot of summers end. Well done
Thank you, Daniel. I'm glad I managed to capture some of that essence here. Appreciate you reading and being here.
This is such a gorgeous little slice of life. No need to apologise for the melancholic nature! Regret is something so painful and hard to write without cliche. I love the image you create - which says it all.
Thanks Kate, that's some lovely feedback. I know but also don't quite know where this one came from. (From meditations I have become acutely aware of thinking about the nature of reality more and more.) The opening line and image kept repeating within me, so at the weekend I gave in to it. To be honest, it was refreshing to constrain myself to so few words this week. It sure makes editing/proof-reading a quicker task! 😅
Love that - it came from within.
Right it could end up being part of something bigger (or not).
I love this piece, Nathan. You have a gift for creating such a vivid sense of place with just a few words.
Thank you, Ben, that means so much. I hope you don't mind the use of your name. I considered changing it, but as I'm sure you know, sometimes names are indelible.
I’m honored to have my name used in such a great piece of writing.
Very poignant. " I caught the sheen of a single tear on his cheek": exquisite prose.
Thank you, Terry. Sometimes I wonder whether there's any worth in posting about the revision process and how a line can change and change and change, because that line of so few words sure underwent a lot of edits until it felt right. But then perhaps no-one wants to see or read about what could have been.
Funnily enough, that is exactly what I'm working on, partly, for my next behind the scenes post. With a bit of luck that will be out tomorrow, so YOU can tell ME😉
How funny! Well, colour me excited.
Well, I wouldn't start canceling appointments or throwing a sickie yet just in order to read it as soon as it goes live. 😂
Absolutely gorgeous ... poignant, touching, gentle. Beautifully unfolded.
Thank you. That means a lot. Thank you for dropping in for a read and comment 😊
My favourite line possibly: "The water accepting it with a welcoming plunk." Beautifully done, Nathan,
Yes, mine too!
Great minds, Chloe ;)
Thanks, Mya. It's also my favourite line and one that felt immediately correct for the scene. 🙏
" fingers laced behind my head, feeling the breeze against my cheeks, listening to the crickets and the buzz of another bumblebee. The last sounds of summer." Love.
🤗 Thanks, Stephanie.
Thank you for sharing another beautiful, magical, transporting, and pensive piece. I'm intrigued by what prompted you to write it. And of course I would wish for it to be part of a lager work!
Thanks Nadia. I think I know where the seed has come from, but honestly, there was just this specific scene and that opening line floating around my head, over and over. So, it had to be written out to see what it was.
Oh absolutely. I'm glad you wrote it. Amazing how it kept floating in your head over and over again. It happens to me a lot too with poems and flashes.
That's so great. Conduit 😆👏
lololol
Beautiful. Tender as the last minutes in a train station, when time stretches long and yet still compresses to nothing before the inevitable moment of parting.
I think your comment is more beautiful 😆 That's so perfectly put.
Thanks, Renee.
Wonderful piece. Your writing is so beautiful.
Thank you Michael, that just made my day 😊
I hope you're having a great week.
I enjoyed reading your story, Nathan. The richness of the details makes it beautifully immersive and once again you show that natural talent of knowing exactly how to write human interactions without making them forced. The things that are left unsaid, the body language, the way the world around feels given a certain context. Very inspiring stuff.
Did your male character commit suicide?
Thanks Claudia, you're too kind.
I wanted to leave a lot unsaid and up to the reader, but in my own interpretation and in writing this, yes, he did.
It was partly why I was hesitant to post this. Do you think it's ok? I see some people put warnings about themes at the top of their writing, but I thought to do so here would be to force an interpretation, and I think there are several interpretations here and that is perhaps just one of them.
We are but channels...
Absolutely gorgeous. What a compelling piece.
Thank you, my friend :)
Wow. Special. Thank you. So much.
You're quite welcome, I'm so pleased you enjoyed, Beth.
“Like, everything.” He squinted at the sky, then shrugged. “All of it. I don’t think it’s really there.”
Reality isn't real. Human Existence as a simulation of reality. Ben read too much Baudrillard! :)
Wonderful piece, Nathan. I would even go as far as to call it sublime. Chapeau.
Sublime? Gosh, thank you my friend. That's too kind. Even more so when I was so hesitant to even post this piece! 🙏
Ok I take it back then! 😀 sometimes we need to trust our guts ya see, gutsy stuff. Sublimely short.
Hehe. Gut-trusting is the way, it seems.
This is the way.